J's day

Ok so yesterday was a J's day.

I took the day off to spend with her...so she came over at around 11am and we spent all day either on the couch or in bed talking. We started to uhm do naughty things together and she couldn't look at me so I stopped her. I could see guilt was flaring up and consuming her. God she is so different than I thought she was when I first met her. When I first met her I remember thinking that she was really attractive but silly and a little goofy. Plus she was currently in the middle of two relationships and so was I so I didn't think much about her other than I knew I liked her.
Regardless, after I made her stop she got up and said she had to leave. I was a little crushed because that hurts my ego quite a bit. So she left at around 5:15pm and I knew it was almost time for me to go meet my mom for dinner so it wasn't a big deal. At around 6 my dad picked me up from the apartment and about half way to pick up my mom I got this from J:
J 1/23/2008 6:15pm - I hate me - i hate life - it has nothing to do with u - just me
S 1/23/2008 6:16pm - Oh j im so sorry....please dont be sad. Can i do anything to make it better?
Anyway long story short she actually came out to dinner with me and my parents. Dinner went REALLY well surprisingly and J managed to charm my parents. She held my hand under the table and stroked my knee...it was so cute. After dinner she offered me a ride home so I took her up on it hoping to just spend some more time with her. When we got to my apartment I offered her an invitation to come up for a little while...well a little while turned into all night.

I HAVE NOW RECLAIMED MY BED BACK!

Now I just have to figure out how to protect my heart from getting hurt by J.