Be careful what you wish for

Ive been miserable lately. I know it - and if you read anything in my blog....you'll know it too.



Last night K and I got into a fight....about her gambling. She got paid for a landscaping job she did and then bought some scratch tickets. She won...which was good....but then she gambled everything she won away. I got pissed. Shes always complaining that she wants to put money toward the bank or the IRS and then she gambles away any winnings? I just dont get it. It feels like she can never be responsible! I cant handle that anymore.

So when I got home she had packed her stuff and moved out (again). I was ok with it at first....then she called...and turned around and came home (not because I told her to but because it was night time and rainy and she couldn't see to drive). So she came home and we decided to take a trial separation. She was going to go to her mothers house (which has since changed...because her mothers kinda a bitch) but now shes going to a hotel tonight and to a friends house tomorrow.

I want to tell her to come home. I have told her to. She wont.

Im afraid.

for me...for the dog....for us....for her

I guess you should be careful what you wish for....because sometimes the result isn't as easy as you had hoped it would be.

I dont know what Im going to do tonight. I have to go home to let the dog out and feed her but then what? Maybe play some wow and watch tv or try and convince a friend to go out and have dinner. Either way its going to be a long night of crying and heartache.